leave your inhibitions at the door
Yo yo yo! What’s up with my lil kitchen warrior homies? It’s your culinary Jedi master – Sir Mix-a-Lotta-Ingredients. Y’all enjoying the summertime weather out there? Now THIS is the season to be out there in shorts, unlike when I see those crazy-assed white boys in shorts when it was 20 degrees outside. That’s Fahrenheit, not that metric bidness.
I loooooove the summer because that means late nights on the porch getting our drink on. The downside comes on mornings like this past Saturday when The Food and Wine Hedonizzle wakes me up to take me to that fool Farmers Market. Even though it was 7AM, I didn’t mind because fresh produce is always the best. The fresh stuff has the most vitamizzles and nutrizzles, and taste better. But the better tasting ingredients is really only applicable to y’all. Because y’all know I can take old, shriveled-up stuff from WalMart and turn it into culinary gold. Ya heard me? Word, son WORD!
But since I was awake there was no way I’d get back to that sensuous love dream I had. I don’t wanna get into specifics, but let’s just say it involved these two very fine ladies, an eggplant, and a gallon of peach nectar.
So I grabbed a rubberband full of Jacksons and went to downtown Ann Arbor. I’m sure these recipes themselves will inspire y’all, but just in case they don’t here’s a vid to get ya’ll in the seasonal mood.
Basil ain’t that hard to come by now and there’s all kinds of homies selling fresh mozzarella. In this case, I got it from the Zingerman’s stand. What surprised me was the ones selling the tomatoes – some almost as large as my lifestyle. I ain’t at the crib often enough to grow my own produce but I know all about gardening because the shorty next door gives me all the tomatoes I want – literal ones and the euphemistic ones. Knowumsayin? So I know it’s really early in the year to be getting ‘em that big so soon. Anyway, I’m not complaining.
Now, errbody probably has their own version of this, so don’t be hatin’ on me if I missed anything. This is how I roll. And I know I’m supposed to use red tomatoes so the salad looks like the Italian flag. But I bought orange ones, OK? Besides, me and the Italians don’t always see eye to eye. But that’s a story for another day.
- 2 big-assed tomatoes
- 1 ball of Fresh Mozzarella
- 1 bunch of fresh basil
- Balsamic vinegar
- Olive oil (you do know to use extra virgin, right?)
- Salt and pepper, both coarse
1. Slice the tomatoes and mozzarella thinly and alternate on a plate
2. Stick a basil leaf on top of each cheese slice
3. Drizzle vinegar and oil. I usually do 2 parts oil, 1 part vinegar
4. Salt and pepper it.
One thing my homie the Hedonizzle knows best is beets. I’ll give him that much. So here’s his recipe:
1. Slice off the greens if they’re there
2. Toss whole beets (with skins on) in some oil and put them in a baking dish
3. Sprinkle with salt, pepper, and/or herbs de Provence
4. Add ¼ cup of water to the bottom and seal with aluminum foil
5. Roast at 350 for about an hour or so until a knife goes through it easily.
6. When cool enough, peel with your hands.
I sliced a bunch up and put some of my own mustard vinaigrette all over it.
- 1 Tablespoon grainy Dijon mustard
- 2 Tablespoons Red Wine Vinegar
- 5 Tablespoons Olive Oil
- 2 Tablespoons Honey
- salt and pepper
All you need to do is whisk this all together, adjust ingredients as necessary. Unfortunately, that last bit of baby mama drama left me whiskless. So I put it all in a clear container and shook the shiznit out of it.
So any of y’all been to the farmers market lately? More importantly, do any of you fine ladies look like Martha Stewart or Lindsay Lohan? If so, why don’t y’all come on over. I got the peaches.