leave your inhibitions at the door
I overheard some guys complaining about Madonna being tapped to do the halftime show at this year’s Super Bowl because it wasn’t “macho enough”. Ummm, I wonder if they realized that Carol Channing performed in not one, but TWO Super Bowls.
That was a little before my time, though. People around my age were treated to Up With People four times.
Last year’s halftime show featured a rather tepid performance from The Black Eyed Peas, so it looks like they’ve gone back to featuring dinosaurs playing songs they made famous thirty or more years ago. Don’t believe me? Let’s look back at who they’ve had over the past several years:
Obviously, the organizers want to bring out acts that are recognizable and have a large fan base. But they also want to play it safe – even if it means defrosting The Who. I like the Who but, damn, Roger Daltrey can’t sing anymore. And why, since 2005, have they wanted to keep it safe? Because this is what happened in 2004:
Yup, Nipplegate. That year, Justin Timberlake and Janet Jackson performed a medley of hits ending with JT’s hit “Rock Your Body”. As he sings the last line – “I’m gonna have you naked by the end of this song” – he rips Janet’s costume to reveal a decorated nipple. This “wardrobe malfunction” resulted in hundreds of thousands of complaints to the FCC and subsequent fines for indecency. So since then, the NFL has tried to play it safe.
Although there was some controversy in 2007. In the final song of an epic set – his iconic “Purple Rain” – Prince let loose with a searing guitar solo in the midst of a huge Miami storm. He played behind a giant fluttering cloth, with a spotlight projecting his silhouette on it. In the days afterward, however, a lot of people were complaining that his writhing guitar poses and phallic shadow was too sexual for any children who happened to be watching:
I definitely don’t agree. By far the worst thing for kids to see that night was Rex Grossman’s pathetic fourth quarter performance.
Back to Nipplegate, I really don’t know what the big deal is. We Americans get sooooo worked up about nudity. It’s just a breast. It’s not like children are going to be permanently corrupted because they saw one. Even as a father of young kids, I still don’t have any issue with nudity on television. That said, I really don’t want to see Madonna’s wrinkly knockers.
So, in honor of her halftime performance, I present my favorite Guilty Pleasure Madonna song.