The Food and Wine Hedonist

leave your inhibitions at the door

Presidents vs. Pro Wrestlers

I think you can categorize this post as “absolutely nothing to do with food, wine, music, or Lindsay Lohan.” Or as my wife, Boom Boom, would say – “further evidence that he has a steel trap memory for all the things that don’t matter.” Be prepared, I might scare you.

I was reading The Byronic Man’s terrific comic strip-style post on a one night visit to Winnemucca , NV. Among the many funny bits was his meeting with Haystacks Calhoun, the legendary mid-20th Century professional wrestler.

haystacks notinhalloffamecom

All he wanted was a hug. (notinhalloffame.com)

He was a literal mountain of a man – 600 lbs of – who wrestled in the 1950s-1960s. This was back in the day when brawling and brute strength took precedence over showmanship. Back when the flashiest thing about a wrestler was his nickname. The days before colorful costumes and makeup. When men like Dick the Bruiser ruled –

dick bruiser wiki

You want a hug?  I’ll give you a hug… wikipedia.org

Don’t get me wrong, it was still fake. But it was a man’s fake. It was a bunch of wrestlers doing regional tours, fighting in places like the Marigold Bowling Alley in Chicago. Then in the 70s-80s, wrestling became more prevalent on television and we started seeing theatrics and storylines that spanned a television season like a soap opera.

If it sounds like I know wayyyy too much about professional wrestling, I really don’t. I watched a little growing up and in high school. But I had a college roommate who was really into it, so a little bit of it rubbed off on me. So I really just know a little too much about it, not wayyyy too much.

Anyway, we had a theory that the average guy could name more pro wrestlers than US presidents. We tested it with a lot of different guys and only very rarely were we proven wrong – even with high-falootin’ people who claimed they hated wrestling. We checked with friends, classmates, and even randoms in bars. We didn’t get very far with finding women who could name a lot of wrestlers, though. But then again we didn’t get far with any women at all with this wrestling talk.

Wait, wait, wait… I just realized something. I think The Ultimate Warrior is now a pop singer…

warrior Kesha

Ultimate Warrior from bustedcoverage.com, Ke$ha from justjared.com

I haven’t watched any wrestling since college and that was a long time ago, but I bet I can still do it. First, I’m going to embarrass myself by listing all the presidents I can recite without Googling.

Presidents

I’m not even sure Ben Franklin was one, but last guy  sure was. Now wrestlers –

Wrestlers

I think I just proved that Boom Boom’s right – I’m a master of remembering useless information.

I don’t know if the theory holds up any more. I think wrestling’s popularity died down after the 1990s and now Mixed Martial Arts is all the rage. Add in the internet and video games, and I think there are a lot more things to distract guys now.

How many presidents or wrestlers can you name?

Oh shoot… I forgot about Ox Baker.

 

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About thefoodandwinehedonist

I don't know everything about the world of food and wine, but I'm not going to let a small detail like that stop me from blogging about it.

17 comments on “Presidents vs. Pro Wrestlers

  1. the drunken cyclist
    January 7, 2013

    Pretty admirable job on the presidents, I must say….

    • thefoodandwinehedonist
      January 7, 2013

      You know, I thought about it a little more and I’m probably being hard on myself. Being able to list all the presidents from memory is pretty useless, too. At least wrestlers have funny nicknames

  2. Yinzerella
    January 7, 2013

    Ke$ha IS the Ultimate Warrior! Just like Xtina is Dee Snider.

    • seasonedwithsarcasm
      January 8, 2013

      I just want you to know, that upon reading your post, I laughed and snorted chai tea out of my nose.

      • thefoodandwinehedonist
        January 8, 2013

        Haha. Is that more soothing than snorting coffee out the nose? And Kesha is not Warrior’s daughter. I think she IS warrior. You’ll never see them in the same room. Plus, he was from Parts Unknown. So they may have some Benjamin Button thing going on there.

        • seasonedwithsarcasm
          January 8, 2013

          it certainly is. And now that you mention it, totally seems possible that Ke$sha/Warrior are experiencing a Benjamin Button life. I hope their is visual documentation going on. You could make post upon post about THAT!

  3. thefoodandwinehedonist
    January 7, 2013

    LOL… you’re right. I’d pay to see that tag team match – Ke$ha and Ultimate vs Dee and Xtina.

  4. winopants
    January 7, 2013

    That was about twice as many presidents as I can name.
    I can understand why you remember so many wrestlers- how could a name like “jimmy superfly snooka” not be emblazoned on your memory?

    • thefoodandwinehedonist
      January 9, 2013

      More useless info – Jimmy Superfly Snooka was mentioned in Young MC’s “I Come Off.”

  5. M
    January 7, 2013

    You definitely did not embarrass yourself with the presidents. I’m really good with the list (remembered 40 of the 43 before looking at your list when reading this), and you got two of the guys I always forget, Fillmore and Hayes. Although, not only was Ben Franklin never president, Alexander Hamilton wasn’t either.

    Wrestlers definitely have the advantage, though, and I was happy to see one of my teenage years favorites on your list, King Kamala! But seriously, none of the Harts? No Brittish Bulldog Davey Boy Smith? Jake the Snake Roberts? Come on!

    • thefoodandwinehedonist
      January 9, 2013

      Shoot… forgot about them. Was that the Hart Foundation? Was Jimmy Hart part of that? Or was he just a manager???

      • M
        January 15, 2013

        Yep, the Hart Foundation. They had two of the best nicknames of the era, with Brett “The Hitman” Hart and Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart (who was married to Brett’s sister, btw). Jimmy Hart was their manager, but wasn’t related. Later Brett’s little brother Owen joined the group, but he never had a cool nickname, and was mostly after my time, but he was the one who died tragically, falling into the ring practicing an entrance stunt.

  6. seasonedwithsarcasm
    January 8, 2013

    I love how Ke$ha does in fact look like the Ultimate Warrior. The resemblance is uncanny. Perhaps it’s his offspring? You certainly recited more presidents than I could. My brain must just be full of more use(less)ful shit.

  7. UndercoverL
    July 11, 2013

    Dammit… You forgot James Knox Polk who was president between…. Ummm…. 1876(?) And…. Umm…. Plus four years…. 1880(?) And was our illustrious (?) 12th (?) president. He was the non-philandering husband of Martha (sounds appropriate for the times). He had… Ummm…. Four, no six, no three, maybe two (?) children. Not one of which followed him into politics… Or history. Yeah, yeah, that’s the ticket. (Facts need verification.)

  8. Pingback: My Favorites from 2013 | The Food and Wine Hedonist

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This entry was posted on January 7, 2013 by in Stuff, Television and tagged , , , , , , .
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