leave your inhibitions at the door
Yesterday morning, a couple hundred people reached my blog because they Googled “Kristen Kish Lesbian.” I get it – the Top Chef contestant is beautiful and topical. It’s unfortunate that it matters, though. Really, who cares? Chick can cook. Anyway, what’s not up for debate is that my using that as a tag was sheer brilliance in terms of Search Engine Optimization.
And how did I get so smart? Because a couple thousand people reached my blog because they Googled “Fergie” from The Black Eyed Peas. The following is what they got…
Out of the blue, Mini-Me started talking about how Fergie is a “hot chick”. He was 6, which I thought was awfully young for him to be talking like that. While I admired his initiative, I wanted to set a good example for him. So I was really conflicted.
I mean, yeah, the body’s rockin’, but the face – meh. (Did you think I was talking about the objectification of women and shit like that?)
My buddy Mojo, who makes a damn good living in LA as an aquarium god, has seen her in person and says her face is “jacked”. I’m not sure I’d go so far as to call her a butterface. Some days she looks stunningly gorgeous, but others she looks downright broke.
But that body. Oh wait, she’s a musician?
Indeed she is. She’s known mainly for her work in The Black Eyed Peas, however I remember her back with Wild Orchid.
She wasn’t an original member of BEP. Prior to her arrival, they were a critically acclaimed rap outfit with bona fide street cred. But they wanted to bring in a female singer to get a more polished pop sound to widen their appeal. Originally, they had wanted Nicole Scherzinger from the Pussycat Dolls. I mentioned in a previous post that Scherzinger is half-Filipino, but did you know BEP’s Apl.de.ap is also another half-Filipino? Double Represent!
Anyway, Scherzinger was unavailable at the time, so they went with Fergie. The rest is history. She helped catapult them to uber-stardom with her contributions to Where is the Love, Pump It, I Gotta Feeling, and My Humps. (OK, that last one’s a bad example.)
This song itself is run of the mill pop with its catchy beat, but she does earn some points for her shout-out to Taco Bell. What really makes this song pure gold is the rap interlude provided by Ludacris, which includes one of my favorite quotes from any song – “If you ain’t got no money take your broke ass home!”
True words to live by.